“Show? To Who?”

Courtney Chartier served as the seventy-fifth president of Society American Archivists (SAA) in 2020–2021. Her presidential address was delivered on August 7, 2022, during ARCHIVES*RECORDS Annual Meeting SAA. introduced by Dr. Meredith Evans, director Jimmy Carter Presidential Library and a past SAA.Once upon time woman from small community moved away. After ten years, she came back never told anyone much about where had lived or what done that time. Once returned to town, her life way wanted to; fearless high-cost living made other people gossip hate shun her.As lay dying, sometimes friend Nel asks show for life, Sula says, “Show? To who?”This is moment novel Toni Morrison. I heard this exchange before read novel, even without full context story, struck it.There so freedom statement. quote novelist Marlon James his own reading passage, “. . until then no idea mattered. It occurred me worth anything, only person qualified judge my damn self.”A year ago, sat front virtual audience, said, we all deserve grace. be shown it, it turn, fully give ourselves grace need heal, process, rediscover joy does exist our colleagues, collections, profession.”2In follow-up those remarks, wrote, “I don't want move go ‘normal,' but something works better fits makes feel more successful adjusted.”3 These ideas flowed naturally one other. What healing, showing grace, if not learning how fit into lives they change?As Now, quite messy, hurt people. This say has right others; have are accountable some way. But expression shouldn't predicated either providing comfort avoiding criticism I'm interested sort twisted objectivism rejects personal responsibility community.However, am live now. How do myself such complete self-confidence say, who?”I'm sure you can relate. A lot happened country over few years; continues happen. depressed; out control. hopeless. Above all, unwilling world. It's hard, days feels impossible.And why must choose myself, able others. today realized be, because take care nothing left future. No thoughts. grace.How imagine true archival futures giving today? Without, extrapolate James, realizing matter?I hope attend tomorrow's keynote, conversation between Katrina Spencer Jamillah Gabriel (11:00 a.m., room streaming attendees). published an article publication up//root called “The Comprehensive Guide Resisting Overcommitment.”4 won't step Katrina's work (please yourself not), will tell bookmarked machine, home machine (and therefore phone), use tools developed send everyone who sit still long enough conversation, including therapist, Mike.What created powerful speaks broadly needs individuals whole human beings operate within unsupportive systems specifically black operating system. She graces us with wisdom advice.Work like gives advice guidance protect present, space see path forward again challenges hard work, path.But first, myself? Ask yourself, “What system me?”In evaluating, truthful: WANT? Does hours jobs outside your position description? reward conscientious quality work? talk salary stay siloed colleagues? silent? capitulate? bend knee?This does.And anxiety tends find problems there aren't any, struggle constantly mind emotions, unreasonable demands start failing. That it's broken, should can't.This does. And unacceptable.Practice saying now, “This unacceptable.”We play God, sense pulling strings directing puppets seeing big picture knowing actor character. The adjusts scene understand its needs; characters victims writing stage management.Now, two major groups get choose: family work.But family; insidious pattern workplaces managers executives try replicate structures. If parent, them survive. Your well-being tied theirs; isn't.Children also make decisions themselves. workplace, one's child, set boundaries. We choices.And “higher” than hierarchy role parent someone strongest boundaries with. best approach dealing manipulative radical transparency. They know doing right.Power very uncomfortable thing. hold moments Mike: primed power privilege, reject issue when it. You can't, truth is, training, experience, informed decisions. Take back, rooted values, consistent. Know right.I exert right.But old Anxiety loves problem isn't one, easily behalf others rarely me?It's hypocrisy. ego involved. exerting ungraceful, fact highest form myself.Own basic self-grace ask, “Does me?”It selfish, selfless. By truly understanding capacity, colleague, employee, friend, lover, child. gifts shine brightly.Say me?”Systems real, keep creating spaces bad action, complicit that. things reasoning power, habit assumption. challenge habits assumptions grind down exploit us. Considering might important mental physical health; system, institutions just fine.This certainly administrator's plea fix let wishes. Institutions frequently self-care messaging, encouraging meditate yoga break, offering larger salaries, flexible schedules, meaningful benefits negate reduce workplace. Instead, suggest exploitation complicity, recognize realities participate in, while maintaining ideals do.I angry frustrated define work. seek rediscovering curiosity tapping curiosity, motivation surprise.And so, ask series questions: purpose?Why is?What matters? Who for?If agenda, done, way?And can't like/are curious about, “Why this?”And call fair that, direction given, go. Mike consistent.”Are fixing system? Neither. fixed, fixed taking requiring think through actions.The question consider most serve?” Because answer “It serves ME.” Selflessly, selfishly.Questioning beliefs always relevant, urgent ongoing pandemic, which usurp every day. For part, learned long-held assumption could entirely misguided. couldn't focus, after years tobacco-free started smoke again, deeply resented having any part intrude point meetings outside.We absolutely break assumptions. assumed well mentally, pandemic starkest relief not. (I getting better.)And, were false, people? Many seem great rush return normalcy, impulse, begs question, others?”I inside body. Or heart. mind. therefore, are, literally, dangerous. chose focus making responding based power. protects me, care.Shall future?Dreaming future invites beautiful poetry. fellow Texan, Bryan Washington, fine biscuit recipe, labor behind biscuit-making—hell, cooking—is extension I've received myself. we're lucky, ways redistribute particularly queer, crucial among queer folks support communities. Whether supporting trans kids navigating cultures harm throughout country, finding hyperlocal resources hubs beacons isolated their situations, vision inseparable practice care. takes many different forms—accepting alongside whatever bring table.5If wasn't clear first time, repeat “a care.” thing say. (It's probably he's Houston.)Can envision care? Where connected communities crucial, harm, create community, isolated, accept folx are? these actually matter. In same matter, matter extraordinary table.I individual projects across I'll bet institutional mission strategic statements list deliverables. what's right. energy matters. reality real working strive place, “Courtney, show?”“Show? who?”I've quoted brilliant today. People graced passion. Thank Spencer, Morrison, Carollo.For unfortunate closing didn't realize quote. ingrained brain comes lips unbidden. final thoughts come less refined source ingenuity: Jerry Springer.“Take each other.”